my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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