office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
it was like his penis was on wheels.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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