I CAN MOONWALK!
do herpes really smell.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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