Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
