He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
