We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
