Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
