For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
