She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
