How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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