but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
