You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
tell me about the fingering
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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