u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Randomize
