i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
