Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
if only i could text you this smell
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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