he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Randomize
