Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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