wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
my being single is dangerous.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Randomize
