i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
