i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
