11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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