No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
