Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
