You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
