Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize