She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
