so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
People with herpes should wear stickers.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
