But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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