Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
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