is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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