Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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