I will die if light touches me.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Randomize
