dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
