if i can run in heels then i can drive
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Randomize
