If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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