Kiss
Puke
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
