There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
