You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize