I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I think I sprained my soul last night
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
