After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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