I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize