Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
he fucked my hip out of place.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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