i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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