I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
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