hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
