we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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