im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
