I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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