okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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