I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
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